DON'T HATE - RELATE

A life of confrontation is hard. Most of my clients hate confrontations and try to avoid them.
The price they pay is dissatisfaction, high levels of frustration, staying stuck and not getting what they want. It can be infuriating. “Why is this always happening to me?!”

But you don’t have to confront to get what you want. What if you can turn a confrontation into a conversation? A deeply honest chat. Don’t hate - relate.

Here is how that works.
1) Identify what’s true.
2) Express in a way that has the integrity to who you are
3) Acknowledge yourself for doing great work here

When we are triggered, in an uproar, frustrated - in a state of emotional reactivity it’s hard to identify what exactly it’s all about. Your mind will get into rants and defensive thought loops. Ask yourself: what is true here?

You’ll find things like: I’m angry. I need the thing done. I am tired of doing things myself. I feel alone.

And that manifests in a mind chat of: I can’t believe I still don’t have the thing I need and I’ve asked so many times."

Expressing in integrity.

Let’s say you too hold kindness and empathy as an important part of your personality. Of course, you don’t like going ‘angry bitch’ on someone. Although I have a few things to say about ‘bitch’ (like why do we only call women a bitch and angry men are seen as powerful?) for today let’s just go with the desire for kind communication.

If you can shift confrontations into conversations, how will that impact your willingness to shift ‘difficult’ situations? And if you are willing to shift situations, can you see the impact that would have on your success in life and business? The willingness to honestly talk about what is true between people is more powerful than a crystal ball. We can safely predict the trajectory of your future based on your skill to communicate this way!

If you’d like to be coached to do this in your life and business, let’s have an (easy!) conversation.